A s Winter Ball introduces the formal dance season, Granite Bay High School students begin to feel the stress of planning and finding a date.
Although going with friends is a definite option, I’ve always preferred to go with a date as it is part of the “experience” of a formal dance.
However, there appears to be a stigma in these events in which no matter who is asking you, saying “yes” is a must. This is because saying no to someone you may just not want to attend the dance with is seen as coldhearted.
While I agree that it takes courage to put yourself out there and ask someone with the risk of getting rejected, that is no excuse for someone to feel obligated to be put their self in a situation that could cause discomfort or awkwardness.
Ever since my freshman year and the involvement of an ice sculpture, females specifically have been
chastised for turning down a potential date for the simple reason of not wanting to go with that person.
At the risk of being grandiose, this parallels the consent debate. Is it really a ‘yes’ if we feel there
is an obligation to agree?
Although agreeing to intimacy and agreeing
to a date for Winter Ball contrast extremely, they hold the same principle of social pressure – pressures that can cause you to act against what you truly want.
It has even come to the
circumstance in which people find themselves telling their friends to tell potential dates not bother asking because they know that they already don’t want to go with that person, and they don’t want to have to reject
the person themselves.
With that being said,
I still can’t understand
why politely
declining someone is so taboo to GBHS students, and
to people in general.
There shouldn’t be a social trap
forcing one to provide consent for a date, intimacy or anything as a matter of fact. It’s so important in this day and age especially to know your comfort zone and act in relevance to it.
As to those who do decide to go with someone they wouldn’t have if it hadn’t been for the asking: be sure to be clear about your desires and intentions rather than following the
obligatory trend and going with the flow.
And to everyone else: it’s not a crime to reject someone, nor should it be taken to heart if you are the one getting rejected.